Monday, March 21, 2011

Finding the Truth With In

Well its offical...the last nine weeks of junior year is here. 50 days. That's it. Before we turn around, this summer will be over and senior year will be on us. Its an exciting time but its scary as all get out. As this year gets closer and closer to an end, I've come to realize some things about myself. Its well known that I am a junior in the class of 2012 at DAR. Another well known fact is that I use to be a member of the 2012 class at Scottsboro. The summer between my 8th and 9th grade years, I changed schools - I thought it was the greatest thing to ever happen to me - getting away from all the rude, stuck-up, snobby people along with the people i called "friends" but who really made my life a living hell always cutting me down, leaving me out, etc, ect. So I made new friends- friends who I thought were the best ever - until it all started again - the cutting down and leaving out. So I've taken a good look at myself, and asked some pretty deep questions, I've come to realize (pardon my laungage) but I can be a royal bitch and I can be mean and I'm horrible about judging people. I know all this and yet, i keep doing it over and over it makes me ask- from the very beginning, was it everyone else who had a problem or was it me? I'd like to blame someone else but in my heart I know it's not true. So to anyone I've hurt or pushed away or was just rude to- I'm sorry! I wish I could take back things I've said. I wish I could go back in time and all those people I hated simply for being themselves when I was still searching for me and make friends with them. I've always believed everything happens for a reason and to live with no regrets but as I've grown up and found the person I am
inside, I know this cant always be the case. I'd like to think as the time from 6th grade up until the past few months as my dark period- no light at the end of the tunnel - but now- well I think I see the light and it's not far away. Have a wonderful week everyone.

Talk to you soon,

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